K For Karma

So this is how it is...Karma skids to a stop to turn around and slap you across the face. For these couple of years, you've been so blindly oblivious to what you've been doing. Or perhaps you have noticed, but never enough to care. Admit it, you found joy in your careless heartbreaking antics; and it came a little too natural for you.

I don't know if you would've realized it on your own if you didn't have a taste of your own medicine. What happened to you was like a little bit of everything in your past compacted neatly in a gift box of venomous surprise. With it being served on a silver platter by a handsome waiter, who wouldn't want to take a peek?

And your friend is right.. your time of platter serving happens so easily, unconsciously, so often and so subtly; there's no second guessing at what the outcome may be. It will be the same. Doubtful? Just read your life log history, each chapter has the exact same title. After two times, five times, twenty times and you still don't learn, I guess it should be about time that you learn it the hard way.

In a way, it's selfishness; in a greater way, it's vulnerability. Being self dependent for one aspect in life, may it be financially, socially, labor work related or education-wise, is not nearly enough. You can't suppress the word loneliness with the definition of independence, so when you have so many supplemental aspects of independence annoyingly hovering above you, something big has to make up for it.

And so you compensate to this by serving your own silver platters, of course. Unfortunately for everyone but you, a heart so vulnerable makes it all the more a simple job. Simple jobs are snatched by selfish minds, they offer you your craving. Variety and choice, yes, but why are you scrambling to get everything in your cart so carelessly for? You are reckless with the things in your grasp, and careless for the others who need them more than you.

It's a lesson learned, I hope. This lesson might have successfully made a permanent imprint on your forehead. Blame that waiter. But also, thank him.

Love,
Your Voice Within